I have written and rewritten this post multiple times in different forms. It’s incredibly hard to sum up such a large chunk of life in a way that isn’t rambling, random memories.
I’m moving to Kansas City (or have moved, at this point). I always imagined myself finally moving out of West Plains and on to something bigger and better, a place with more resources, more opportunities, more people. But in a way, I thought it wouldn’t happen, or maybe I didn’t want it to happen. It’s scary to pack up your life and go to a new place, to leave behind people and places you already know. But now, after years of education and applying for jobs, it’s really happening.
I’m so excited to start a new job, to help students get what they need to make their education better. I’m excited to try out new restaurants and coffee shops, to find my favorite spots I return to over and over. I’m excited to find a new church, to make new friends, to visit museums and parks and shops. I’m excited to learn how to use public transport, to get a new library card. Opportunity awaits!
But it felt so scary to move. Costs are higher there; I’ll have to be a lot more careful with my money. Traffic is heavier, the commute is longer. I’m moving away from my family and friends. I knew it would be difficult at first. I’m putting a lot of pressure on myself to find a roommate, friends, an apartment, to know the best routes to get places, to be comfortable driving, to have everything settled. And that pressure is so overwhelming. I feel paralyzed in my decision making, alone in a cold dark place.
So I’m trying to take things slow. This homesickness won’t last forever, and eventually things will fall into place. I can trust things will be okay. I’ve already seen glimpses of the good relationships and opportunities that can come out of this. I met some girls at a church I visited, and they were so kind and took me around to introduce me to lots of other people. I don’t regret my decision, but I’m excited to see this hard part become easier.
I will be continuing this blog as much as I can. I’m living with my aunt and uncle right now, so the recipes and cooking part might be put on hold for a little bit. But moving to a new place offers a wealth of opportunities for being able to write about new things I encounter.
Thanks for reading. More to come!
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